Top Ten Things You Should Know About Me :)

I have been feeling the need to write this for a long time, but I am just now having the guts to actually put it down in words (I just sound like such a crazy person when it’s all put into one place!!).  I have a lot of issues, and I know it, I guess I just want other people to be able to understand some of my eccentricities so they don’t get the wrong idea about me… Or maybe the wrong idea is better than the truth... I don't know!

    
     Anyway, here are the top ten things I think everyone should know about me:

1. I am a quiet person in general.  One of my closest friends thought I was a snob when she first met me, because I’m quiet.  Numerous people have thought I hate them... because I’m quiet.  I don't make friends easily because I'm just too quiet.  Usually the quietness stems from the fact that I’m tired and my brain doesn’t form usable sentences when I lack energy.  The rest of the time I just don’t know what to say.  I’m not great at conversation, but I love to listen and be supportive, with whatever problems or ideas you want to send my way.
2. I am not a morning person and I really like my sleep.  Wake me at your own peril, lol!  No matter how fun the activity, I probably won’t want to be involved if it means being up and about before ten in the morning. 
3.  I like making plans... Well, actually, I need things to be planned.  I don’t like spontaneity, which is a cause for great contention in my marriage, as Karl doesn't like anything BUT spontaneity--he thinks planning too much takes the fun out of life.  For me, though, not having a plan makes me anxious to the point of psychosis (or nearly so, anyway).  I get very stressed out when things are sprung on me, even if they should be easy and enjoyable things.  I like to have a plan at least a day in advance, which I know most people don’t understand, but it’s something I need.  If you would like to hang out with me, the best thing to do is to say “hey, would you like to hang out tomorrow (or give me a day, like “Wednesday”) evening and do _______?”  This helps me plan and prepare mentally, and I feel a lot better and am a lot less likely to freak out and just not respond to you.
4. I hate talking on the phone.  Calling people causes me great amounts of anxiety and I may not answer your phone calls.  I really prefer texting, I have unlimited texting, so feel free to text me, email me, or leave me a voicemail if you really need me.
5.  I don’t keep my phone with me at all times.  I don’t have a smart phone, I just do silly things like texting and calling on my phone, so I usually leave it somewhere (while I'm chasing an extremely active baby all over the house) unless I need to do one of those two things. I really am sorry if I don’t get back to you right away.
6. I tend to forget to text people back.  I’m not ignoring you, I’m just busy, at work, my baby is trying to help me text, or I fell asleep and forgot!  Please feel free to bug me again. I am superly sorry if this offends anyone.
7. I am an introvert.  While you may think this means I’m shy (which I am…), what it really (also) means is that being around a lot of people is draining for me.  I like hanging out with a couple of close friends at a time.  I don’t like crowds of people (and by this I honestly mean like 3+), and I don’t like being around people for long periods of time (like more than a couple of hours).  I need time to recharge after seeing people.  I need alone time just for myself.  I’m finding that I really even need alone time from Evie too, which is a hard thing to do.
8. I get embarrassed easily and I stay embarrassed for a long time.  I don't like situations that can be potentially embarrassing, and I don't like other people to be embarrassed.  I'm actually overly empathetic, which sounds like it should be a good thing, but I end up doing things like feeling really embarrassed or guilty FOR other people... It's kind of sad.
9. I like to listen, but I have a really hard time sharing.  I am very happy to listen to problems, I don’t get weirded out by odd questions, problems, or stories--I am a health person (which covers everything from child development/heath, to sexual relationships/heath, to psychology, to weird diseases, to behavior change), so I’m not too surprised by most things, and I generally won’t judge you ;)  I am, however,  a little reluctant to share.  Part of that is just not knowing how to express myself the way I want to (see #1), part of it is a trust thing, and part of it is that I don’t have much to talk about aside from my craziness and my adorable baby… and I figure people get tired of those topics :)
10. I have a lot of health problems (I promise, I'm not a hypochondriac), and I have a hard time doing things that take a lot of activity or last a long time (I know, I feel like an old lady most days).  I also don’t have a lot of energy because of some of my health problems, which is another reason people think I hate them.  When I don't have energy I will often zone out and stare off into space, or have a blank to unhappy look on my face, which makes it seem like I'm disinterested, grumpy, sad, etc., when in actuality, I just don't have the energy to do anything with my face or to be involved very actively in the conversation.

Like I said, I know I have issues.  I'm trying to work on most of them, but I've got to admit, I'm not making a lot of progress very quickly, and some of those things are just never going to change about me.  I want to have friends and a social life (even if it really doesn't seem like, after reading all that), so if you still think you can handle me knowing how crazy I am, I would love to be friends with you :)